Thursday, October 01, 2009

I Hate White Guys' Health Care Plans

I must confess that I oppose all the health care reform plans that white guys have come up with for over forty years. It all started with LBJ, who gave us a plan which is not only already bankrupt, but which will bankrupt generations not yet born until it is mercifully euthanized. Then Jimmy Carter proposed a health care reform, but he had things so screwed up that America pulled the plug on him and turned the mess over to Ronald Reagan to clean up.

I have to thank Bill and Hillary Clinton for their attempt at health care reform. It was so awful than it brought us the Republican takeover in 1994, which lasted until the Republicans forgot why the American people voted for them to replace the feckless Democrats.

Al Gore had a plan, and John Kerry too, which the voters spared us from suffering.

Now another white guy has a plan, and I now know, thanks to the media, what motivates me to oppose it: racism.

That's right.

All along I thought I didn't like dumb Democrat health care plans, but thanks to the media I see the light.

It was racism all along.

LBJ, Jimmy, Bill and Hillary, Gore, Kerry, Obama - what's the common link?

That's right, they're white!

And I don't like their health care plans because I'm racist.

Of course!

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