Global Warming Speak

Global Warming Speak, and translation, courtesy of National Policy Analysis:

"One has only to look at the Second Assessment Report of the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) - the United Nations body tasked with coordinating a world response to the threat of global warming - to understand why global warming theory advocates have been so successful. Among the many gems in the report is this one: "Warmer temperatures will lead to prospects for more severe droughts and/or floods in some places and less severe droughts and/or floods in others."

The University of Virginia's Dr. Patrick Michaels has taken the time to translate this sentence for us. It means that global warming will be characterized by "more intense wet periods, more intense dry periods, more intense wet and dry periods, less intense wet periods, less intense dry periods, and less intense wet and dry periods." Precisely how this is different than a world without human-enhanced global warming is unclear. From year to year, some areas of the world have always experienced more severe droughts and floods than others. Likewise, some areas of the world have always experienced less severe droughts and floods than others. With or without global warming, this process will continue in the future."

In other words, expect the same old weather, but with a lot of Gore-y spin. Like the ancients reading destiny by examining the entrails of goats, so every manifestation of weather - storm, drought, snow, no snow, hot, cold - will be a sign of the "Global Warming To Come."

Man made, of course. All the hundreds of previous periods of global warming, solely Nature's doing, are now dismissed because Al Gore and the Global Warming Fundies (Fundamentalists) want to indict prosperity caused by economic freedom as the cause of possible disaster in the future.

Since this global warming is natural, and warmth benefits many activities, such as growing crops, more than cold, why this fear that only bad will happen? During previous warming periods, the results were enormously beneficial for mankind. Why wouldn't they be this time too?

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