Fight To Get Your Virginity Back!

Bombs away!

The latest bumper sticker to catch my eye philosophizes, “Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.” I laughed. I like a little salacious humor, and it’s fun to point out this sort of thing to see the reactions of the young ladies. It’s been a while since any of them blushed.

But remembering Socrates, "A life not analyzed is not worth living!" So too the bumper sticker not analyzed is not worth reading.

So to begin the analysis. The obvious first point that begs comment is that the author is unclear on the concept of virginity. I recall a story told many years ago of a young man’s first trip to Tijuana. He was approached by a young boy who said: “Hey, Meester, you want me seester? She a virgin.” When the young man indicated he didn’t want the sister, the boy persisted, “You want me madre? She a virgin too.”

Obviously, the Mexican boy and the bumper sticker author share the concept that virginity is a renewable resource. My late first wife Marilynn was also a member of the renewable virginity club. For years she told our three sons that she was still a virgin. Then one day, Bruce our oldest, said “Mom, they taught us in Sunday School that there was only one Immaculate Conception, but you had me and Scott and Jeffrey. You’ve been fooling us, right?”

Now the analysis of “fighting for peace.” When you are attacked by someone, if you don’t fight back you don’t get peace. You get involuntary servitude. If you're lucky. The only time after being conquered that you will have peace is at the whim of your conqueror, who may let you live in peace, but never in freedom.

So if you don’t fight back, you may have peace, but even that isn’t guaranteed. All you can be sure of is that you’ll lose your freedom. Of course, if you do fight back, you may still lose, in which case you could be as bad or worse off than by surrendering. However, you may win, or fight to a standstill and gain a truce. At either rate, fighting back is the only chance you have of keeping your freedom, and more to the point, of perhaps in the process eliminating your adversary as a future threat to peace.

As John Lennon said: "You either get tired fighting for peace, or you die." It's funny to be on the same side of an issue as John Lennon.

Relax. I know he didn't mean it that way.

There is one method which, if followed, will maintain peace without ever having to fight. If you demonstrate both the will and the ability to decisively crush any attacker, you will never be attacked by a nation-state. However, you are still open to attack by ideologues, such as Islamofascists, acting independently or supported surreptitiously by states such as Iran and Syria. The only way to regain peace when dealing with fanatics is to retaliate and pursue them relentlessly. To do anything else is just to set the stage for their next attack.

Once you lose your virginity, abstinence won’t get it back. But the only way to keep or regain peace is to be ready and willing to fight and win.